Beyond Outrageous

http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/ottawa/story/2012/06/19/ottawa-man-called-too-obese-to-have-custody-of-two-sons.html

My daughters (aged 14 and 16) and I have been following this story for a few days now. They are beyond saddened by this, and as one them aptly stated with deep fear "if he can lose his kids, then you could lose us!"

How long will it take before the courts decide "you're not pretty enough to be a mom", or "you're too short to be a dad" because really, that is what this boils down to.

The children's aid society claims that he became aggressive and loud with them. In other reports it was noted that they also claimed he didn't know his own strength because his "handshake was so strong it would hurt".

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!

As a mother currently in a custody dispute, there is nothing and no one I wouldn't take down or scream at or lose my composure over if they even TRIED to take my kids. To be told I couldn't have them when I'm ready, willing, capable and able...well that just wouldn't go well for anyone.

If you said the tattoo on my back was justification. Or that I had premarital sex was justification. Or that I believe in god, or Prada, or the Muppets was justification. Or that you just didn't like me was justification. I would lose it everywhere.

There is no way to know how good a parent he is. There is no way to truly know how good a parent anyone is. We're all just doing the best we can with what little we have. I know that I came into the job with the only experience of having once been a child. Basically the same qualification and training that most of humanity has.

The fact is that this man has lost more than a significant amount of weight, has abandoned drugs and has shown shown a bigger effort to improve his life to fight for his children than many out there whose so called 'ailments' are not as superficially apparent.

Do these clock punchers in an agency who has more often been in the media for being over worked and under funded than for making the right choices even KNOW what it takes to do what he's done to better himself? They say, you're too fat. He loses weight. They say, you smoke marijuana, he stops. They still withhold his children?? I don't get it.

All I know for certain is that this whole thing scares the bejesus out of me. Am I next? Will I lose the kids I adore because of my tattoo on my back? The blemish on my face? The attitude I have toward child services?

I'm certainly not living in the country I thought I was. Especially when THIS woman is allowed to have 3 children and live freely with them:

http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2012/06/21/karla-homolka-guadeloupe_n_1616715.html?utm_hp_ref=canada

SERIOUSLY?