Thursday, July 19, 2012

Like Weekend Update but different!

More of Jen's Marvellous 1 am ramblings...the BLUE is my in my head commentary responses!

-dog attacked by beaver (who knew they could be vicious buggers?)

I’m going to guess this is actually a euphemism…seriously….dog? Beaver? You can’t make that shit up!!

-bad date rescue app (um, that seems like a lot of work for nothing...whatever happened to, I don’t know, telling the truth?  I mean it gets you out of the date but you still aren’t being very nice or fair, they’re still gonna think it’s tickety boo)

Designed for lazy scared people.

-hunk of ice twice the size of Manhattan cracks off Greenland (well that effectively renders every map and atlas useless now)

What’s scarier is if it DIDN’T!!! And really...why don't we get Atlas updates yearly like we do Webster's Dictionary updates? 

Anywho, on to what I’ve learned this week:

-those little fruit fly things?  Yeah, don’t sniff too aggressively when they’re near.  You will snort them.  And then they come out later when you blow your nose.  It’s quite gross...maybe there is merit to that wives’ tale that you eat 8 spiders while you sleep.  I always thought that was bunk but who knows?  I certainly don’t, I’m asleep!  How did they come up with that statistic anyways?  Watch people every night over a year?  That seems unethical to watch people eat spiders.  What if they’re poisonous?

If I can’t sleep tonight I blame you!!!!!!!

-Squishing spiders with steel-toed boots proves to be harder than one would imagine.  The suckers pull their legs in and scuttle about, with me stomping like an idiot and they always seem to fall where the crack in the sole of the boots is so they live.  I had to stomp no less than ten times tonight.  I’m sure that was fun to watch on camera lol.

Total absolute complete visual is making me laugh at my desk!

-it’s funny how you can have both something that makes you question humanity and have hope for humanity happen in the same day.  I’m choosing to stick with the hope for humanity and focus on that.  I guess that makes me an optimist after all, even though it is a frustrated one!  It turns out I’m also a frustrated perfectionist lol!

Right!?!? This is me everyday! Every time I think the world couldn’t disappoint me more and humanity has gone to hell something happens to restore my faith…sort of.

I often wonder if it isn’t that humanity hasn’t really changed much BUT the fact that so much is fed to us through media now that we are just so hyper aware that humanity isn’t really changing or evolving it’s just more accessible to despise humans, you know?

-Co-op was playing old school rap.  That shit never gets old!  Plus I got to embarrass my kid while I tried to rap along and remember the words...I believe that is called win-win.

Did you do all the sick moves too? Cuz that would’ve been EPIC…sorry A but your mama is FUNNY!

-Apparently I type loud and it’s bothering the nurse on the unit I’m on.  It’s not bothering me.

I feel your pain…Kyle reached over at the optometrist today to turn off my ‘volume’ on my phone…apparently the clicky noises bug him…no pleasin’ some people I tells ya!

I was going to comment on the other point you put in but that is between you and you know who but lets just say it makes me super happy to hear your ramble at 1am and to know you’re so happy. I’ve waited a long time (almost 2 years now!) to say this:
SEEEEEE!!!??? Isn’t it just amazing!?!?!?

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