Thursday, June 21, 2012

I'm writing a better story...

One of my favorite author's is Donald Miller. These days I'm not particularly Christian or particularly any denomination of any faith. But he is a Christian author, and he's my favorite.


Nearly four years ago  my faith was shaken. To it's roots. Nearly four years ago my world, the world of my children, was shaken. Everything I had believed to be true was wrong. Today I am so filled with the deepest of gratitude for that experience. 


The reason he's my favorite is simply:




My dear friend, Marilyn, gave me this book on one of my darkest days during that time. I was lying in bed with a 4 year old who had recently broken his leg, the break happened the evening after my husband of 13 years had moved out of our home and in with his brother, when I first opened the cover.

Do not misunderstand, I had asked my now ex to move out. Things had happened in our marriage that I couldn't get past--bad, horrible, normal, mundane things that happen to many marriages, but I simply couldn't let them go.

At that point I had survived months of verbal barrages that he had 'made a mistake' and I was 'obligated' to forgive him; an effective, if not brilliant campaign of misinformation to bolster his position with friends and family, whilst continuing to undermine mine; and finally a physical altercation. All of this solidified my confidence that the decision to ask him to leave had been the right one.

I first picked up the book, empty and battered. Worn down and broken only to find the first several chapters, well....boring. They were as mundane as my days had become. I fought through continuing on to realize as the book progressed so did the words write themselves upon my heart and into my psyche.

We all have the power to write a better story for ourselves.

To say that this was life changing is an understatement. Every part of my belief, my confidence, who I really thought I was had been wrapped up in this man, another human! And the simplicity of being told through a gentle story of another's life, that *I* had the power to write a better story was so completely liberating and humbling. 

From that day I took my first steps, I began to learn to forgive myself, even if he couldn't, for the things I'd done wrong, the mistakes and wrong turns I had taken. 

My life was changed because of that book coming to me at EXACTLY the right time. My gratitude to you Mr. Miller is immeasurable, my gratitude to the lovely lady who gave it to me is infinite. 

We all have choices, some days we make good ones, some days we make bad ones. But as long as we are writing that story for our selves, we can always remember that Hope Floats...


2 comments:

  1. Hi, your blog really touches me, have been reading it for a while... Just wanted you to know about a website i started ReadYourBiblesChurch.com... It's a place for Bible study guides.. I also put a forum in that can be viewed from a mobile device.. I couldn't find where to contact you privately so I'm commenting, hope that is okay. :) God Bless! Jenn.

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  2. Thank you Jenn! It's totally ok, and I'm glad that you enjoy what I write/my putting myself "out there", which is hard to do sometimes with some topics! Take care!

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